Dear Kids,

This blog is especially created for you! I'll post small stories, puzzles, jokes, etc. (mainly old ones, occasionally new ones) for you from time to time. This blog is dedicated to three people: (1) My grandpa - Fondly known to all of us as Appappa - who told me so many lovely stories (2) My cousin and friend (Uncle S for you) - who keeps teaching me lots of things that I can do on the computer. (3) My beloved wife (Aunty P for you) - who likes to hear my grandpa's stories from me. Hope you like this blog - Keep visiting! [If you are not a kid (or a kid at heart!!), use this blog to entertain kids known to you!]

Love,
Uncle N

(Pl see the note of caution at the bottom of this page)

December 11, 2008

Deceptive Looks!

Deceptive Looks!

Dear Kids,

A lady in a faded grey dress and her husband, dressed in a homespun suit walked in timidly without an appointment into the Harvard University President's outer office.

The secretary could tell in a moment that such backwoods, country hicks had no business at Harvard and probably didn't even deserve to be in Harvard.

"We want to see the President," the man said softly. "He'll be busy all day," the secretary snapped. "We'll wait," the lady replied.

For hours the secretary ignored them, hoping that the couple would finally become discouraged and go away.

They didn't and the secretary grew frustrated and finally decided to disturb the president." Maybe if you see them for a few minutes, they'll leave," she said to him.

The President, stern faced and with dignity, strutted toward the couple.

The lady told him, "We had a son who attended Harvard for one year. He loved Harvard. He was happy here. But about a year ago, he was accidentally killed.

My husband and I would like to erect a memorial to him, somewhere incampus." The president wasn't touched....

He was shocked. "Madam," he said, gruffly, "we can't put up a statue for every person who attended Harvard and died. If we did, this place would look like a cemetery.

 "Oh, no," the lady explained quickly. "We don't want to erect a statue. We thought we would like to give a building to Harvard."
The president rolled his eyes. He glanced at the gingham dress and homespun suit, and then exclaimed, "A building!"

Do you have any earthly idea how much a building costs? We have over seven and a half million dollars in the physical buildings here at Harvard.

"For a moment the lady was silent. The president was pleased. Maybe he! could get rid of them now.

The lady turned to her husband and said quietly,  "Is that all it costs to start a university? Why don't we just start our own?"


Her husband nodded.

The president's face wilted in confusion and bewilderment.

Mr. and Mrs. Leland Stanford got up and walked away, traveling to Palo Alto,
California where they established the University that bears their name.
Stanford University, a memorial to a son that Harvard no longer cared about.

Most of the time we judge people by their outer appearance, which can be misleading. And in this impression we only tend to treat people badly .By thinking they can do nothing for us thus we tend to loose our potential good friends, employees or customers.

Happy reading!

Uncle N


 

November 18, 2008

Trivia - Just for you

Trivia - Just for you 

For all you trivia buffs. If you knew any of this, my question is why? If you did not, then all your trivia is bunk; this is the real stuff.


1.      Coca-Cola was originally green.

2.      The most common name in the world is "Mohammed".

3.      The name of all the continents ends with the same letter that they start with.

4.      The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.

5.      TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be typed sing the letters only on one row of the keyboard.

6.      Women blink nearly twice as much as men!

7.      You can't kill yourself by holding your breath.

8.      Like fingerprints, everyone's tongue print is different

9.      People say "Bless you" when you sneeze because when you sneeze, your heart stops for a millisecond.

10.  It is physically impossible for pigs to look up into the sky.

11.  The "sixth sick sheik's sixth sheep's sick" is said to be the toughest tongue twister in the English language.

12.  If you sneeze too hard, you can fracture a rib. If you try to suppress a sneeze; you can rupture a blood vessel in your head or neck and die.

13.  Each king in a deck of playing cards represents great king from History."Spades" King David; "Clubs" Alexander the Great; " Hearts" Charlemagne; "Diamonds" Julius Caesar.

14.  111,111,111 x 111,111,111 =12,345,678,987, 654,321

15.  If a statue of a warrior on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in the air, the person died as a result of wounds received in battle. If the horse has a all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.

16.  What do bullet proof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers and laser printers all have in common? Answer: All invented by women.

17.  Honey is the only food that doesn't spoil.

18.  A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.

19.  A snail can sleep for three years.

20.  All polar bears are left-handed.

21.  American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one olive from each salad served in first-class.

22.  Butterflies taste with their feet.

23.  Elephants are the only animals that can't jump.

24.  In the last 4000 years, no new animals have been domesticated.

25.  On average, people fear spiders more than they do death.

26.  Shakespeare invented the word 'assassination' and 'bump'.

27.  Stewardesses is the longest word typed with only the left-hand.

28.  The ant always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.

29.  The electric chair was invented by a dentist.

30.  The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.

31.  Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats could have over million descendants.

32.  Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times.

33.  The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.

34.  Most lipstick contains fish scales.

35.  It is impossible to lick your elbow.

36.  And finally over 90% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow.

Happy reading!

Uncle N


 

November 04, 2008

Obama & John McCain Jokes

Obama & John McCain Jokes

With the flavour of the season, let's have a few jokes from the US Elections:

  • Unlike other candidates in the Republican primaries, John McCain says he believes in the Theory of Evolution. In fact, he watched it happen with his own eyes.
  • Q.  When does John McCain usually go to bed?
    A.  Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch.
  • At his last birthday party John McCain managed to blow out every one of the candles on his cake. Unfortunately, several of his guests had to be treated for wax poisoning.
  • John McCain is far more knowledgeable and experienced than Barack Obama when it comes to Islamic nations. McCain fought there during the crusades.
  • Barack Obama's release of what he claims to be his 1961 birth certificate is being questioned since it appears to have been made with a laser printer. There's no question about the authenticity of John McCain's birth certificate. It's carved in stone.

Happy reading!

Uncle N


 

October 16, 2008

Lion Joke!

Lion Joke!

How does a lion greet the other animals in the forest?

'Pleased to eat you.'!

Uncle N


 

Mystery Maths!

Did you know????


Did you know something else? Don't try it out on Microsoft Excel - Try it manually. Excel doesn't know enough maths to get the right answer for this one!!!!
N





October 15, 2008

God is missing!

God is missing!

Dear Kids,

Long time since I shared a story for you!

Two little boys, ages 8 and 10, are extremely mischievous. They are always getting into trouble and their parents know all about it. If any mischief occurs in their town, the two boys are probably involved.

The boys' mother heard that a preacher in town had been successful in disciplining children, so she asked if he would speak with her boys. The preacher agreed, but he asked to see them individually.

So the mother sent the 8 year old first, in the
morning, with the older boy to see the preacher in the afternoon.

The preacher, a huge man with a booming voice, sat the younger boy down and asked him sternly, "Do you know where God is, son?"

The boy's mouth dropped open, but he made no response,
sitting there wide-eyed with his mouth hanging open.

So the preacher repeated the question in an even sterner tone, "Where is God?!"

Again, the boy made no attempt to answer.. The preacher raised his voice even more and shook his finger in the boy's face and bellowed,

"Where is God?!"


The boy screamed and bolted from the room, ran directly home and dove into his
 room , slamming the door behind him..

When his older brother found him
 crying , he asked, "What happened?"

The younger brother, gasping for breath, replied, "We are in BIG trouble this time.

..........................

("I just LOVE reading next line again and again")

................................

................................

..........................

...................

...............

......


...


...


...
..
GOD is missing, and they think we did it!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Happy reading!

Uncle N


 

July 16, 2008

Misty, Secret Agent Cat

Misty, Secret Agent Cat 

Dear Kids,

Guess that I've been busy enjoying life while someone pointed out that I've not been regularly posting anything in any of my blogs.

Interesting to observe that my blogs are ALWAYS read when I don't post anything! Looks like I should post more infrequently.

Here's something that I just found - one which is frequently a childhood dream of many kids - to be a Secret Agent - What remains a dream to most kids, became a dream come true for a cute little cat. Read on to enjoy the story of Misty, the cat that became a Secret Agent!

Happy reading!

Uncle N


 

June 19, 2008

The 99 Club!

The 99 Club!

Dear kids,

Here's a wonderful short story that I got from a cousin of mine. Enjoy!

 

Once upon a time, there lived a King who, despite his luxurious lifestyle, was neither happy nor content.

 

One day, the King came upon a servant who was singing happily while he worked. This fascinated the King; why was he, the Supreme Ruler of the Land, unhappy and gloomy, while a lowly servant had so much joy.

 

The King asked the servant "Why are you so happy?"


The man replied: "Your Majesty, I am nothing but a servant, but my family and I don't need too much - just a roof over our heads and warm food to fill our
tummies."

 

The king was not satisfied with that reply. Later in the day, he sought the advice of his most trusted advisor.

 

After hearing the King's woes and the servant's story, the advisor said
"Your Majesty, I believe that the servant has not been made part of The
99 Club."

 

"The 99 Club? And what exactly is that?" the King inquired.


The advisor replied, "Your Majesty, to truly know what The 99 Club is, place 99 Gold coins in a bag and leave it at this servant's doorstep."

 

DONE!

When the servant saw the bag, he took it into his house. When he opened the bag, he let out a great shout of joy... So many gold coins!


He began to count them. After several counts, he was at last convinced that there were only 99 coins.

 

He wondered "What could've happened to that last gold coin? Surely, no
one would leave 99 coins! "


He looked everywhere he could, but that final coin was elusive.


Finally, exhausted, he decided that he was going to have to work harder than ever to earn that gold coin and complete his collection.

 

From that day, the servant's life was changed. He was overworked, horribly grumpy, and castigated his family for not helping him make that 100th gold coin. He stopped singing while he worked.

 

Witnessing this drastic transformation, the King was puzzled.

 

When he sought his advisor's help, the advisor said "Your Majesty, the servant has now officially joined The 99 Club."


He continued "The 99 Club is a name given to those people who have enough to be happy but are never contented, because they're always yearning and striving for that extra 1 telling to themselves: "Let me get that one final thing and  then I will be happy for life."

 

We can be happy, even with very little in our lives, but the minute we're given something bigger and better, we want even more! We lose our sleep,
our happiness, we hurt the people around us; all these as a price for our growing needs and desires. That's what joining The 99 Club is all about."


"HOPE WE WILL NEVER JOIN THIS "99" CLUB."

Happy reading!

Uncle N


 

June 17, 2008

Little Ramesh scores "A" in Maths

Little Ramesh scores "A" in Maths

Little Ramesh was doing very badly in maths. His parents had tried everything; tutors, flash cards, special learning centres, in short, everything they could think of. Finally in a last ditch effort, they took Ramesh down and enrolled him in the local Catholic School.

After the first day, little Ramesh comes home with a very serious look on his face. He doesn't zoom out to play with his friends, as usual. Nor does he sit in front of TV and start watching Cartoon Network.

Instead, he goes straight to his room & starts studying. Books & papers are spread out all over the room and little Ramesh is hard at work. His mother is amazed. She calls him down to dinner and to her shock, the minute he is done he marches back to his room without a word and in no time he is back hitting the books as hard as before. This goes on for sometime, day after day while the mother tries to understand what made all the difference.

Finally, little Ramesh brings home his report card. He quietly lays it on the table and goes up to his room and hits the books. With great trepidation, his mom looks at it and to her surprise, little Ramesh got an A in maths. She can no longer hold her curiosity. She goes to his room and says: "Son, what was it? Was it the nuns?"

Little Ramesh looks at her and shakes his head "No".

"Well then", she replies, "was it the books, the discipline, the structure, the uniforms, WHAT was it?".

Little Ramesh looks at her and says, "Well, on the first day of school, when I saw that guy nailed to the plus sign, I knew they weren't fooling around.

Happy reading!

Uncle N